Co-sleeping With Our Babies

Dear Readers, The topic of co-sleeping with our babies is apparently a very “hot subject” and one for which people feel extremely territorial. In our complex world, a kaleidoscope of scenarios abound (women raising children alone, etc.) and therefore strong feelings emerge on both sides of the debate. Being a sexuality counselor and having a focus on helping couples re-establish their intimate relationship to ensure a healthy sexual life after the “happy” event, I do have an opinion on this practice. A major issue for many expert opinions against the practice of children sleeping with their parents is the increased risk of death. The U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission and the American Academy of Pediatrics highly recommend not sharing a bed with a child under the age of 2. They argue that it can increase the risk of death from suffocation, strangulation and sudden infant death syndrome (www.babycenter.com). Dr. James J. McKenna, who heads the Mother-Baby Behavioral Sleep Laboratory at the University of Notre Dame, said that “most cases of infant death while bed sharing involved extenuating circumstances, such as intoxicated or overly obese parents” (www.huffingtonpost.com). For me, a major concern is the damage that bed sharing can have on a couple’s intimacy level and ultimately their overall satisfaction and fulfillment in the relationship. “More than half of the children who sleep with their parents, […]

Continue reading

Real Relationships: Withdrawn co-worker

Q: I work in a small(ish) office setting where we try really hard to engage in a positive manner with all the employees. We have one girl who, despite numerous efforts to draw her in, does not participate in any work functions and shuns most polite conversation. I have no idea why she is like that, but I don’t like the fact that she ignores everyone and excludes herself from what we are doing! Should I just leave her alone or continue to try and engage her? A: There are a lot of people who choose to distance themselves from their coworkers. Everyone has their own reasons for acting the way they do at work, whether it be to engage everyone or no one. What you need to remember is that she is either painfully shy and does not know how to act around a group or she has personal reasons for keeping her distance. That is her right, and trying to push her to act differently may further withdraw her. However, if she does want to interact, but doesn’t know how, it may be appropriate for you to try and engage her in a controlled setting, with just the two of you. Start by asking her work-related questions, so that you aren’t getting more personal than she is comfortable with. If she responds positively […]

Continue reading

Retiree benefits data released to the Bee

The agency that manages retirement benefits for Sacramento County employees provided in-depth information about retirees’ finances to The Sacramento Bee earlier this week after a lengthy court battle. The Sacramento County Employees’ Retirement System released information about retirees on June 13, Richard Stensrud, the chief executive officer of SCERS said Wednesday. Joyce Terhaar, executive editor of the Bee, confirmed in an interview Thursday that the newspaper received retiree information from SCERS after suing for it in 2010.“In general, it should have been available from the beginning,” Terhaar said, referring to the data SCERS submitted. The Bee, which joined with the First Amendment Coalition in a lawsuit against SCERS in 2010, is currently working on stories about the retirees’ information, Terhaar said. She added that she did not know the dates the stories will be published. The Bee stories may report information that includes the names of retirees and beneficiaries who are collecting benefits, their retirement dates, the names of the departments or agencies for which they worked, their jobs at the time of retirement and how long they were in the retirement system, according to a June 9 letter Stensrud sent to SCERS members. Retirement allowances, cost of living payments and current retirement payments could also be included in the stories, he wrote. A June 10 Bee editorial said that the taxpayers should not be […]

Continue reading

Council’s closed meetings on Vina examined

A number of recent City Council meetings relating to Interim City Manager Gus Vina, including the council’s January vote against his promotion, have been closed to the public. An attorney and open government advocate commented on the Brown Act Friday, saying he opposes “closed session” meetings on hiring and firing matters affecting the city manager. Terry Francke, an attorney for the nonprofit open government group Californians Aware said city manager hiring and firing decisions should be made public. Central to the issue of closed meetings is the way city officials interpret the Brown Act, a state law intended to make government meetings open to the public at the local level. The City Council met in a closed session on Jan. 25, when it decided in a 5-4 vote not to promote Vina to the permanent city manager position. City Attorney Eileen Teichert said the closed session complied with the Brown Act. “The closed session was duly noticed for the purpose of considering appointment or employment of the city manager, consistent with the Brown Act,” Teichert wrote in a Feb. 3 email. “The council’s decision in that closed session to proceed with a nationwide search was a byproduct of their discussions whether or not to appoint Mr. Vina as city manager.” But Francke noted that the City Council made a choice to hold the meeting in […]

continue reading

Real Relationships: Keeping peace in the workplace

Q: I have one of those co-workers who always wants to know what is going on in my personal life. Every Monday he asks personal questions about what I did over the weekend, how my boyfriend is and even how my dog is doing. I don’t want to be rude, but I am the kind of person who likes to keep my work life separate from my personal life. I know he is just trying to be nice, but frankly I don’t want him knowing anything personal about me. How can I make that clear without coming across as unfriendly or just plain mean? A: Don’t worry, you aren’t the only one with this problem. I think we all have that co-worker who thinks that we are "BFFs" and wants to know all our secrets. You have every right to keep the separation between work and home, but there are ways to walk the line in order to keep the peace. 1. Don’t ask questions about his personal life. That may seem obvious, but it is harder than you think. As humans, we are personal people, and in conversation you may ask about their weekend without even realizing it, thus giving them an invitation to ask about your weekend in return. 2. Try to avoid situations where casual conversations take place (i.e. the break room, […]

continue reading

Social Networking “In-Real-Life”

Social media enthusiasts from around the city gathered Tuesday night at The Urban Hive for the Sacramento Social Media Club Relationships and Social Media presentation. With Valentine’s Day just behind us and the ever-increasing role of social networking in our day-to-day lives, relationships via the online frontier was a timely topic for discussion. Four speakers headlined the evening, and the audience was filled with some of Sacramento’s most active facebookers and tweeps. Up first at the podium was independent marketing consultant Paul Ardoin, who discussed facebook privacy settings and how to manage them. "facebook is a for-profit entity; every decision facebook makes on your privacy, they are thinking not about you, but about their revenue stream." Paul suggests checking your facebook privacy settings regularly to make sure they’re still to your liking. He also recommends creating friends lists to take advantage of facebook privacy granules, especially if you have a boss who likes to critique your facebook activity. Lanette Capellas, Staffing Director for The Agate Group, then discussed social media from an HR perspective. Layoffs are increasingly due to social networking negligence, and an overzealous willingness to share. One of her main points: think before you post. Is venting about a bad day at work worth losing your job over? Lanette thinks not, and most are likely to agree. If your fingertips get the better […]

continue reading

What’s happening at the Capitol: January 27, 28

Wednesday, Jan. 27 Noon – 1 p.m. The California Prolife Council will be holding a "Rally For Life" on the West Steps of the Capitol. Following the rally, the group of approximately 350 will meet with legislators. Thursday, Jan. 28 Noon – 1:30 p.m. The California Office of Privacy Protection will be holding a press conference on the north steps of the Capitol. They will discuss the importance of protecting privacy by disposing of personal information, especially electronic data. Approximately 15 people are expected. No further events will occur outside the Capitol until Feb. 1.

continue reading

Violations, revisions and contacting us

 VIOLATIONS OF THIS POLICY   Any improper collection or misuse of information provided to Sacramento Press is a violation of our Terms of Use and should be reported to privacy@sacramentopress.com.   TERMS OF USE, NOTICES AND REVISIONS   If you choose to use the Web Site in any manner, your visit and any dispute over privacy is subject to this Privacy Policy and our Terms of Use, including limitations on damages and of the provisions related to jurisdiction and application of law of the state of California. We reserve the right to change our Privacy Policy and our Terms of Use at any time. Non-material changes and clarifications will take effect immediately, and material changes will take effect within 30 days of their posting on this site. If we make changes, we will post them and will indicate at the top of this page the policy’s effective date. We therefore encourage you to refer to this policy on an ongoing basis so that you understand our current privacy policy. Unless stated otherwise, our current privacy policy applies to all information that we have about you and your account.   CONTACTING SACRAMENTO PRESS   If you have further questions about our Privacy Policy please email your questions to: privacy@sacramentopress.com.   (END OF PRIVACY POLICY)

continue reading

Security

SECURITY   We maintain physical, electronic and procedural safeguards to protect the information collected about you. Access to such information is restricted to individuals who need it in order to provide you a good experience with the Web Site. Employees who violate these confidentiality requirements are subject to our disciplinary process. Where third parties provide support services, we require them to conform to our privacy standards.   (Privacy Policy continues in next article, "Violations, revisions and contacting us") 

continue reading

Changing or removing information

 CHANGING OR REMOVING INFORMATION   It is important that the information we maintain about you is accurate and complete. If you have reason to believe that we have information about you that is incomplete or inaccurate, please write to us at: {431 I street, STE 107, Sacramento, CA, 95814} or email us at support@sacramentopress.com so that we can update this information.   (Privacy Policy continues in next article, "Security")

continue reading